Men's Rights

The eternal argument between men and women is probably the toilet seat. Women have for years cracked the shits with men for "leaving the seat up". Sure, it would be more practical for anyone who wastes time whinging about the angle of the toilet seat to simply move the seat themselves, but if women were practical Lousis Vuitton wouldn't be selling glorified purse's on handles for $1000 a pop.

Over the years however I have noticed a rising trend of toilet seats that do not stay upright by themselves. You know what I mean, it sticks in the back of your mind. You go to use a public toilet to do a number one, you put the seat up and notice that it doesn't stay up by itself, almost like it was never meant to be used by men in the first place.

You are stuck with a dilemma. Touching a toilet seat is not a desirable experience in the best of circumstances, so the prospect of using one hand to hold up the seat in a usually disgusting public toilet for the extended routine just isn't going to happen. You could sit down to piss, but the average public toilet seat gives off germs just by looking at it, so you wouldn't want to sit down unless it is completely necessary.

A middle ground is getting a square of toilet paper to hold up the seat without touching it, but odds are the seat is already in a disgusting state anyway so why bother. And it is much better to use two hands when doing your business, its a complicated and delicate process after all.

But I am sure I am not the only one that has noticed a significant rise in these defective toilet seats over the years. They used to be a rarity but now I am estimating they make up at least 20% of public toilets.

The only logical explanation is that they increase in female engineers/designers in the last decade or two has med the sisterhood to end the toilet seat up/down debate by stealth, by designing defective toilet seats that do not stay up by themselves.

We must fight this abomination.